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Unforgiveness Part #2

There are many paths to removing unforgiveness in your heart. While they might differ in their approach, they have many of the same qualities in common. I’ll try to list these in a practical order.

Here is a mental toolkit. Use those techniques that work in each situation. Remember that no two situations will ever be a like.

What to do when someone has made you angry?

  1. Visualize the offense of the other person. What did they say? What made you angry? Did you say something in anger back at them? Where did it all go wrong?
  2. Now that you have it firmly in your mind, ask yourself, was I just being overly sensitive? Was I reading more into it than was really there? Did I miss interpret their comment or action?
  3. Take responsibility for your actions in the situation. If you were over the top, admit it to yourself. Ask, how could you have handled it differently?
  4. Admit that other people have bad days (even lives). They will not act nice. They will do things that hurt you.
  5. Visualize the other person in front of you. Say that you forgive them for what they did. Let them know that we all have done things that we wish we could have done differently. Finally, acknowledge that you are doing this not to condone what they did. Instead, tell them that you want to release the hurt over this situation, and move on. Picture them with understanding in their eyes. Wish them well. Let the visualization fade.
  6. You should feel relief. Your emotions should calm down.
  7. Give yourself a mental hug and pat on the back. Let yourself know that you are worthy to have peace in your life.

How to stop being too sensitive?

  1. Release past hurts quickly. Don’t let them stay around in your heart. They are poisonous. They keep your love from flowing.
  2. Try to start over with the other person. Give them a smile. Encourage them when they do something right. Don’t be over-critical. Tell them thank you when they do something for you.
  3. See the best in every situation. Give people the benefit of the doubt. No one has all of the answers, not even you. Be patient. Be understanding.
  4. If you must, give them space. Leave for a while.
  5. Let your wounds heal. Then, try seeing that person again.
  6. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive.

What else needs to be done?

  1. Pray. Take some time to be with God.
  2. Tell Him what has been going on, or simply get very still. Do the one that feels appropriate.
  3. Let your emotions get quiet.
  4. Forgive yourself for getting upset.
  5. Remember that there’s always a chance to start over.

I hope this toolkit brings peace into your life. Nameste.

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